The Kaye Way

I'm extremely well read.

2012-02-11T19:05:00.000-05:00

Okay, the above post title is a lie. What I do is I wait for a novel to become popular or ingrained into the pop culture, then I grasp on to that bookish bandwagon for all it's worth. It was like that with the Twilight series (ugh), and The Harry Potter Books (amazing), and The Hunger Games trilogy (fantastic).

I love book series (serieses? serieii). I enjoy spending long periods of time with characters that I've gotten attached to. Which is why I don't mind falling into a series later in the game. Because I prefer to read all the books in a row without stopping. How on earth were people able to wait between Hunger Games books? That would have been brutal. I could barely wait overnight once I finished Catching Fire to download Mockingjay. Did I mention that I prefer audiobooks? What better way to get supper on the table, commute to work, run on a boring treadmill or just plain feel like a little kid getting read to by your mummy or daddy than listening to an audiobook before bed?

Anyway, all that said, I'd like to share with you the weighty tomes that are on my bedside table. Here they are in no particular order:

3 magazines about Will and Kate's wedding
1 magazine about the life (and death) of All My Children
1 Walking Dead graphic novel
1 Archie comic digest
1 companion book to Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog

So now you know what a cosmopolitan, sophisticated and urbane individual I am. Do with this valuable knowledge what you will.

kxx

When was the last time you "had a moment"?

2012-02-04T18:27:00.000-05:00

Earlier this week I was sitting in my car on my way to work when I burst out crying. I cried and drove for a few blocks, then wiped my tears and it was over. I had had a moment.

It was prompted by a couple of things. That morning when I got dressed, I grabbed for a pair of earrings and noticed that they were the pearls my brother and I gave my mum for her birthday. The last she had before she died. No problem. Worn them a million times. But then in the car they played "Celebration" by Kool And The Gang which was her favourite song. I felt like she was saying "hi" and I just lost it. Those things usually don't set me off but that day they did. The thing that made me stop blubbering was wondering what must the other drivers be thinking (hostage situation? raw chopped onion sandwich?) and the fact that I must be the only person in greater Ottawa that is wailing during what must be one of the most happy songs in the world. I started to giggle and that was it.

I felt great after. It was one of my best days of the week, in fact. These bawling sessions don't happen very often or last very long but they sure make me feel great. I'm curious. Do they happen to you? How often? What's your trigger? How do you feel afterwards?

kxx

I'm just putting this out there...

2012-01-30T15:40:00.000-05:00

You know this movie out now? The claptrap romance between 3 whales and Drew Barrymore? Here's the trailer if you missed it:

I'm irritated by the names of these whales. While I'm delighted by the fact that they went to my era (the prehistoric?) to find the names for these creatures, why did they go for "Fred", "Wilma" and "Bamm Bamm"? Everyone (at least everyone as old as me... did I mention at work today my young co-worker Jessica had no idea what I was referring to when I mentioned Liquid Paper? But I digress...)

Everyone knows that Bamm Bamm was Betty and Barney's kid and Not Fred and Wilma's. I'm just saying. It bugs me so much that this movie, which looks overwrought, overblown and overdramatic anyway, but I'll never watch it (even as a rainy day rental to see John Krasinski's pretty face) because of this unfortunate misstep. There. I feel better now. Please return to the gay old time you were having.

kxx

I haven't abandoned you, I just haven't had anything good to say!

2012-01-28T10:31:00.001-05:00

I have found in the past when I forced myself to blog when I had nothing fascinating to say, my posts contained a lot of, well complete and utter crap. Lots of "ummms" and "so...". As loyal readers, I know you expect more from me so I've scaled back to only posting when I have something juicy. Or when a week goes by without posting like just now. So...

The Oscar nominations have come out. For reasons that I haven't shared with you, I'm not feeling them this year. I uncharacteristically haven't gone to see many movies this year so even popular stuff I didn't get around to seeing. I think the last movie I saw in the theatre was Harry Potter and that was back in the summer.

This means I have 9 movies to watch between now and the Oscar telecast in 29 days. If you think this'll be easy, let me remind you that I've got a job, 3 kids in sports and other after school activities, a husband with a full time job who also plays hockey and will be away for a week starting tomorrow, and a lukewarm desire to do this in the first place.

I have to say that thankfully nearly half of the movies are on dvd so I can see them on demand from the comfort of my living room at any point of the day which helps. But that still leaves 5 usually 3 hour "epics" that usually leave me depressed and needing a Monty Python palate cleanser. Remind me why I do this again? When are they going to nominate the kinds of movies I love like Bridesmaids or Transformers? Why do I have to learn something or grow from a "good" movie? Shouldn't I be having fun for my $13 ticket and $25 spent at the concession stand? Remind me why I'm doing this again?

In case you missed them, here are the nominations in order of my desire to see them:

The Help (This is the only one I wanted to see before the noms came out)
The Artist (Looks interesting... 2D, no talking, black & white? What's not to like?)
Moneyball (I think this'll make me laugh. Love Jonah Hill)
The Descendants (George Clooney is awesome)
Hugo (The trailer makes it look interesting but I have my doubts)
War Horse (A horse movie? I haven't been a 12 year old girl in a loooong time)
Midnight in Paris (Never been a Woody Allen fan)
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (A 9/11 movie. Sigh. It'll be poignant and force me to cry. Ugh.)
The Tree of Life (Never heard of it)

kxx

The lineup for autographs forms on the left, please.

2012-01-21T15:23:00.001-05:00

I got recognised at the grocery store yesterday. I was knocking on acorn squash with my knuckles, wondering how on earth you were supposed to tell whether or not they were ripe, when a woman got all up in my grill. I thought she was going to ask me to shift my cart or explain to me the fine nuances of mature gourds but she said:

"Excuse me but you look familiar."
Confused Me: Pardon?
My New Best Friend: You look like someone on tv. Were you and your family on a chicken commercial?
CM: Are you serious? Yes, we were. I can't believe you recognised me from that!
MNBF: Of course! You have a beautiful family and a great smile.
CM (I give her my number 8... the one that shows a few molars): Thank you so much!
Awkward pause as I wait for her to ask for my autograph or to take photo with me as I'm clearly her hero. Nothing happens and she just smiles weirdly at me.
CM: Okay, um, well, have a nice weekend!
I go back to rapping my melons and she wanders off.

I'd like to thank the Chicken Farmers of Canada for providing that weird and wonderful moment in my life. It was the first time a complete stranger has recognised me from the ad. Friends and family have seen it and commented, I get calls from acquaintances who I haven't seen in ages after it airs but never this. I have to admit it was pretty cool. And for those new friends and readers who have never seen the ad in question, I'll post it below. I still say that the smile at the end is more like the look I frequently have on my face when one of the many boys in this house "cuts one" but still, people tell me it's fine.

kxx

A rare experience with racism

2012-01-18T17:50:00.000-05:00

Let me begin by saying that my New Year's Resolution was to drink more water. For my health, for my skin and to curb my appetite. Downside, peeing in the middle of the night (Do you know how cold hardwood floors are at 3:22am? You don't want to) and peeing every hour during the day. Upside, you get to know every toilet between your place and everywhere you need to be.

Okay. Back to the racism. Let me just make it clear that the racism was a good thing in my case. Allow me explain. For all intents and purposes, I was trapped on public transit on my way to work. I was trying my hardest to concentrate on other things but my bladder just wasn't having it. I was literally bursting. I knew for sure there was a bathroom at a mall on the way but it was about 10 minutes away and my bladder had about 25 seconds before critical mass. Luckily I was at the Lincoln Fields transitway station, a pretty big transfer stop where I knew that there was a little store and a place to take photos for passes. Employees + 8 hour shifts = Bathrooms. Union rules. I sprint off the bus knowing is relief close at hand. I think I pushed a man with a cane, but I can't be sure.

I went to a ticket window and through the little hole, asked the woman where the bathroom was. Let me state here that she was Black.

Ticket Woman: There is none.
Me: There is none? Are you serious?
TW: Sorry, Ma'am.
Me (Not even caring that I got called "ma'am" and torn between the indignities of begging, arriving at work with pee down my leg and urinating in the nearby bushes at rush hour. The begging wins out): Please! I'm dying here! I'm sorry but I notice that there are at least 5 people that work here. You can't tell me that you don't have a toilet in here. I'm not going to poo and stink it up (see what I mean about dignity?) but I'm desperate. PLEASE.
TW (she looks me up and down and stands up, picking up some keys and looking furtively both ways): My manager better not see me but you're a sister. Come on.
Me: Oh my God, thankyou!

She locked her booth, walked across the hall to a small grey door and unlocked a tiny windowless toilet that was so small my purse and I barely fit inside. I peed like a happy racehorse, not even caring that in my hurry to take off my pants I'd thrown my hat and purse on top of the plunger in the corner.

It wasn't until I got back on the bus that I'd realized that I'd been the victim of racism. She'd only told me about the toilet because I was "a sister". If I was white would I have been forced to pee outside in front of hundreds of rush hour commuters? To be honest, I didn't really care. I got to "go" and I learned a valuable lesson. Never have nearly 2L of water before you get on any form of transit.

kxx

Remember this post?

2012-01-11T17:05:00.000-05:00

http://kayeway.blogspot.com/2008/11/audrey-what-woman-not-on-my-watch.html

Well, it didn't happen that way at all. Much to my surprise and delight.

This morning I was on the bus when I got a call. "Are you busy?", the little voice on the other end said. "Well, I'm on the bus... what's up?" And she told me.

I promptly pulled the bus dinger, called my husband to say we were the parents of a woman and my co-workers to tell them I'd be late and rushed home. Well as much as you can rush when you're on a meandering city bus. Doesn't this driver know I have a woman at home to attend to? She went to bed last night a little girl and look what happened when I took my eye off the ball.

On the ride home I thought of when she was little. Like photographs in an album. The picture of her smiling big at the camera at 2... the shot of her and Henry in helmets on decorated bikes at 5... the photo of her terrified eyes as she got her ears pierced for her 6th birthday... I may have cried a little.

I got home and couldn't stop hugging her. I showed her what to do, gave her a pad and an Advil to take to school and that was that. I asked her if she had any questions and she said they just covered it in health class yesterday. I blame the school.

I told her we'd go get something special at the mall to commemorate the big event and for a meal in a restaurant after. I just want to make this special and not the soul crushing burden it becomes in reality. There are only a few times in life when you are delighted to get your period and most of them involve copious amounts of Sambuca and really questionable judgement. I just want to make this one of those delightful times for her. And it's completely Sambuca-free.

Congratulations beautiful girl. Can I still be proud of her even though neither of us actually did anything?

kxx

New York!

2012-01-09T18:03:00.001-05:00

The Kayes went to New York City last week and we has such a good time. Okay, Audrey and I had such a good time... I think Scott and the boys were a little "meh" about the whole thing.

We decided to take the train so Scott wouldn't have to worry about icy roads and NY traffic. Good idea. Unfortunately the trip took 14 hours and by hour 8, all we wanted to do was be there already. I think that was somewhere between Montreal and Saratoga Springs or the horrible microwaved train burger and the time someone in a seat up ahead started clipping his talons. I'm not sure. Note to travellers: DO NOT CLIP YOUR FLIPPING NAILS IN PUBLIC. It's nasty.

Besides the shopping, walking around, the meeting a new/old friend, the highlights of the trip was the NBC tour, Statue Of Liberty Boat Tour and the Top Of The Rock view.

Since I started work this morning and the trip is rapidly becoming a distant memory, please enjoy what I'm going to call:

Our Trip To NYC By The Numbers (feel free to ask questions for illumination)

Number of children sickened by dodgy sausages: 1
Laughing fits: Countless. Most notable... Cirque De "Sofail" and you know that ad with the women getting on the motivational scales? We pissed ourselves trying to think of mean things it could say like "WTF" and "OMG"... I guess you had to be there.
Temper tantrums: 1 (but they let me cry it out and I was fine. Seriously, 0)
Shopping trips: At least 5 (keep in mind we were there only 2 full days)
Taxi rides: 3
Times stuck in traffic: 5 (trust me, it's possible)
Visits with family who live nearby: 0
Visits with a friend I've only ever known online: 1
Blocks walked: Easily hundreds
Average temperature: -8C with the wind chill (try going on a boat tour in that weather)
Number of times I felt like a kid in a candy store: Every minute I was in that city, including the time I was actually at a candy store at the back of FAO Schwarz

So, we had a wonderful time and we'll definitely do it again. Next time I think someplace hot. We were floating the idea of Cuba on the long (long!) train trip home and once that was mentioned, it was game over. Next year the Kayes are going to Cuba! I've got a year to save and work on the boys...

kxx (Please enjoy my favourite photo of the trip, taken by accident on the boat cruise... isn't it awesome when that happens?)

Resolution time!

2012-01-02T12:45:00.001-05:00

I don't really make them, but I thought I'd I'd try a few this year. I expect all but a few will fall by the wayside by the end of business tomorrow but that's always the fun part of resolution making too, isn't it?

Someone close to me admitted to something that I vow this year to never let them forget. They will not take me for granted in 2012. Maybe that should be this person's resolution but it never hurts to help things along...
I want to keep the house cleaner. No, it's not in a Hoarders state of affairs but if the huge dustbunnies behind the sideboard are any indication, it's time to actually move the furniture when I sweep.
I want to love my body, not just tolerate it. I don't want to lose weight (that ship has sailed) but I want to love what I have going on. Some people's goal weight is my weight the way it is today. I need to remember that. I can run, paddle, swim, bike... who cares if I'm 30 pounds overweight and my stomach looks like the Michelin Man's when I sit down? My ultimate resolution? Don't sit down.
Blog more often. I recently had a friend (Hi Lisa!) tell me that she missed my daily blogs. While I can't promise to write everyday (unless I get paid... come on deep pocketed, desperate publisher of my dreams), I will resolve to write at least 3 times a week.
I'll try to call the kids names only when they deserve it. But it's so tempting to call them idiots when they're acting idiotic. I'll try to remember what Dr. Phil always says "you can't put kittens in the oven and call them biscuits". Wait... that was apropos of nothing. Whatever.

So I hope 2012 is wonderful for everyone. To be honest, the end of 2011 was pretty heartbreaking for me so I'm looking forward to a happy, optimistic new year.

kxx

Henry

2011-12-28T18:12:00.000-05:00

Real name: Henderson. Scott wanted Henderson after his father's middle name. I wanted Henry after my grandfather. So on paper his name is Henderson but we call him Henry. Perfect.

Henry is smart and is really eager to please. Often too eager. He'll bring home a straight B/C report card and hand it to us with sad dismay in his eyes. For us, after dealing with his language processing delay, a report card like that is fantastic. He could never, ever disappoint us.

Henry makes me laugh every day. He's got the most deadpan sense of humour that you've ever seen. Sometimes I actually wonder if he's actually not joking and I'm laughing when he's not trying to be funny at all. Hello therapy bills and motherly guilt. Then I'll see the little twinkle in his eye. Whew.

Henry's most like me out of all my kids. He likes bright colours, he has dimples and he's ~~overly~~ super dramatic. He's adventurous and full of fun. Plus he's super cute and a little nuts. What's not to love?

So this is a post for my Henry. Yesterday was his 12th birthday and I hope he has the best year ever. I love you baby!

kxx

Today is Henry's birthday!

2011-12-27T18:50:00.000-05:00

We had a crazy day coming back from my dad's in Montreal and baking more stuff for his special day that I didn't have a chance to do the blog I would have liked for him. So this is a place holder for tomorrow's blowout birthday blog for my big boy. See you then!

kxx

Seasons Eatings, Peeps!

2011-12-24T09:31:00.000-05:00

Here's what's on tap today in terms of my slaving away in the kitchen. Oh, and just in case you are wondering, I'll tell you what passes for "helping" with my merry band. I'll be clanging grouchily around in the kitchen about 20 minutes after all the cooking, signing, ouching over the inevitable burn or dropped pan is actually over. I'll hear a tentative rustling in the kitchen doorway and someone will ask "can I help?" To which I'll answer through gritted teeth, "no thanks" and continue to pick at the stupid plastic wrap because I lost the edge. Again. It's a lot like the Little Red Hen story around here when it comes to helping in the kitchen. Except that they still get to eat. And I mustn't forget the "can I just get in here to make a coffee/get a bowl of cereal/make toast" thing that'll happen halfway throught the proceedings where they barely notice I have flour in around and on every orifice.

Wait... I started this post to talk about what I was going to make today. Here's what I should be doing instead of blogging:

6 pie crusts for 3 pies (sugar, apple and the tourtière for our réveillon dinner tonight)
An enormous batch of pain-in-the-ass sugar cookies (that's not the actual recipe name, it's just that they are an actual pain to cut out and frost)
Bacon jam
Make a triple batch of egg nog
Cinnamon rolls for our traditional Christmas breakfast.

If you say to yourself "Hey, Karen, that's only 5 things, it should only take you a couple of hours!", I'll respectfully invite you to bite me because, add to this list that I'm a mother on Xmas Eve which means I also have to clean, do laundry, pack bags for our trip to Montreal tomorrow, get Audrey's bangs trimmed and still wrap presents. So I'm predicting a 3 hour "sleep" tonight in a pile of tape and wrapping paper, aided by 4 or 5 glasses of butterscotch schnapps laden egg nog.

And you wonder why I prefer to sit here blogging instead of getting right on this? So what are your plans for today?

kxx

Christmas Quiz

2011-12-19T18:42:00.001-05:00

What better way to make this glorious season of giving and generosity all about me?

1.Wrapping paper or gift bags?
Wrapping paper for ourselves, gift bags for friends and extended family. I love you but I hate wrapping.

2.Real or artificial tree?
Growing up we had a fake but since having my own house, it's been back and forth. This year since we won't be spending too much time here at home, we dragged the fake out of storage. I'm digging it after the Christmas tree incident of 2007. Plus it holds heavy ornaments better than the real one and the cleanup will be a needle-free breeze.

3.When do you put your tree up?
Depends on my Bah, Humbug spirit. One year I had it up at the end of November. This year I put it up last week. The older I get, the less motivated I feel. Now I understand my dad's position of not putting it up at all unless the grandkids are coming.

4.When do you take your tree down?
This has gotten complicated ever since Henry arrived. He was born on the 27th. Before that we took it down whenever we felt like it. Anywhere between the 5th of January and the 5th of March. Since Henry and my obsession to make his birthday all about him, I had at first insisted we take it down completely on Boxing Day. When my laziness and sloth proved too overwhelming, I devised the "birthday tree" dodge. We take down all the Christmas decorations and put on more wintry themed items. Then I add a birthday banner and balloons all over it and voilà... birthday tree. Once his birthday has passed, I lose the balloons and banner and the tree stays up until the spring thaw.

5.Do you like eggnog?
Oh yeah but only the one I make. The stuff from the store is vile.

6.Do you have a nativity scene?
Nope. The most religious we get around here is when Linus does his thing on a Charlie Brown Christmas. That and the first few minutes of the Life Of Brian.

7.Favorite Christmas Movie?
Ohhh, that's a toughie... I love Scrooged and the Alastair Sim version of A Christmas Carol. But the girly girl in me absolutely adores Love, Actually.

8.Favorite Christmas cookie?
Soft ginger cookies and traditional decorated sugar cookies.

9.Where will you eat Christmas dinner?
This year at my dad's in Montreal but traditionally in my own kitchen.

10.Angel, bow or star on top of your tree?
We do a star.

11.Most annoying thing about this time of the year?
The crowds at the mall. Ugh.

12.Do you like Fruitcake?
Love, love LOVE fruitcake. But my favourite is West Indian Black Cake. It's unlike anything you've ever tasted. Dry is something you can never say about black cake. And you can get tipsy from the fumes alone. You know that giddy feeling you get pumping gas? Like that only tasty. I'm attaching the recipe. Check out the alcohol content. Yes, you read that right, that's 3 bottles of booze.

13.What are you most excited about the holidays?
I'm thrilled about our train trip to New York City. We leave on the 2nd for a week.

14.Do you open presents Christmas Eve or Christmas Morning?
We open the gifts from "The Sandman" (which are always pyjamas) on Xmas Eve and the big show is on Xmas morning. I got fed up with the photos on Christmas morning where the kids are all wearing stained, holey and generally gross jammies.

15.Will you still be wrapping presents on Christmas Eve?
Yes. I have plans every year to finish it by the 20th (today!) and get to bed early but every year at 2am I'm still wrestling with tape and cursing the fact that I have no paper left.

Merry Ho Ho, peeps!

kxx

Stupid Costco.

2011-12-18T13:24:00.002-05:00

I go through that place just for one thing and leave at least $150 lighter every single time. I see "deals" and I'm so easily tempted I can't help myself. Like the time I needed relish and saw a jar that could easily house a small crocodile. And for only $3.99! The problem was that I only use about a tablespoon of relish every time I need it and the jar was "refrigerate after opening". Where was I going to keep the thing after I used my tablespoon? It's too bad loose relish doesn't make acceptable gifts or sturdy packing material. Moving on...

So Costco did it to me again in the form of a pound of dried figs. Who needs a whole pound of chewy figs? But they looked so enticing and they were only 4 bucks. "How wonderful! So many recipes at my disposal with yummy delicious dried figs!", I thought excitedly as I threw them in the cart along with the jeggings I never wear and the 5000 count AAA batteries. Cue the sound:

Those damned figs sat in my pantry getting dusty until I finally found a recipe that'll use all the crunchy weird figs in one go. Feast your eyes on the Fig Spice Cake I just made:

Tasty AND good for the old digestive system. So bite me, stupid figs and dumb Costco.

kxx

It's been over a week since my last blog

2011-12-14T17:16:00.000-05:00

And yesterday my stat counter told me I had over 100 hits! The fact I get more than four familial fleeting daily glances at this blog never fails to surprise me. So thank you for coming. If any of you newbies are so inclined, can you click on the comment box and tell me what brought you here? That'll help me blog about more things you may enjoy. Or not. The likely outcome is I will just keep blogging about whatever I want. But it never hurts to try.

So onto other things. I was quickly checking online this morning and ended up looking at women's naked bellies for 30 minutes, nearly making me late for work. I wish I was kidding. I had waded into xojane's "real girl belly project". Who knew that squishy, rock hard, tattooed, pierced, innie, outie, bruised, even stented bellies could be so hypnotising? Just the bellies photographed, no faces with an optional comment underneath. I'm officially addicted. I've scrolled through the gallery twice already.

So inspired was I by all these brave women that I whipped out my camera, set its timer, took a bunch of belly shots that I deleted so fast I must have wrecked the hard drive. Then I threw away the pieces of the camera I crushed under my shoe. Because clearly, it's defective.

Okay that last part isn't true.

I read a lot of captions the women wrote on that site which said that the reality of their photos wasn't as bad as they thought. Lucky them. Because after the retching and comical chest clenching stopped, I couldn't believe my own stomach looked that horrendous. Yes, I went in knowing it's flabby. I know it's pock-marked and I've been cut from stem to stern three times (and it looks it) to remove those damn kids, but even in comparison the the stomachs on that site, I just couldn't deal with what I saw. I work out and I'm super fit but what I got going on below the equator is unacceptable.

You know I have very little to hide from you all after blogging since 2006. You know waaay too much about me and my pretty mundane life. But I'll state this with all the certainty I can muster: You will never ever EVER see my unsucked belly. Never ever. Did I mention ever?

Again, it's a case of reverse anorexia that I suffer from. I think I'm pretty fly then I see a photo and I have to go out and buy yet another new camera. Oh well. I have other attributes. Like I bake a pretty mean cake. Please distract yourselves by looking at my favourite. Forget I ever mentioned bellies.

kxx

Sometimes art irritates life

2011-12-06T19:38:00.000-05:00

You know the saying "art imitates life"? Well, I misspoke it the other day and the title of today's blog was born. Now I'm tasked to think of a blog to go with it. Hm...

Got it!

I'm not an art lover. At least Not the kind that enjoys abstract art. I just spend the whole time complaining that I (or worse yet, my kids) can do a better job. Really, Picasso? Would you really want this staring over you in your living room? Brrr...

I don't think so, Jackson Pollock. It's like he failed preschool. I just don't get it.

Yuck.

But nothing makes me happier than a painting that looks like something else with a touch of the surreal. This is my most favourite painting in life. Aaah.

Plus I like French Impressionists:

Monet (look at the sunshine... you can just feel the warmth and smell the breeze)

And Degas

These make me so happy. At the Musée D'Orsay in Paris a few years ago I completely lost my shit and cried like a moron in front of a Toulouse Lautrec. For no other reason other than it was so darned purty.

So that's my photo-heavy blog on art. Next time I crack myself up with a random trip of the lip, I'll be sure to let you know.

kxx

I've got mail!

2011-11-30T16:13:00.000-05:00

About a week ago I got a package from London in the mail. It's been ages since I've gotten any personal mail and even though I was expecting it, it was still a charge. Remember when getting a letter (without a window) was a normal occurrence? When seeing a handwritten envelope was an everyday thing?

I know email is an amazing convenience. I don't think I've sent a handwritten letter in 3 years. Not even a Christmas card. Those (if I send them) only get signed with a quick "Happy Holidays!" scrawled inside. But the thrill I got when I saw my name written in pen on the front... it was nearly a squee-worthy moment. I almost felt like I won a prize.

This is the season of cards and update letters so even if you don't send them out, maybe try mailing one letter. A personal one written with pen and paper (typed and printed doesn't count), stuck with stamps and hoofed out to your nearest mailbox (which seems to be further and further from the house every year). It may be one of the cheapest yet most appreciated gifts you can give. Think about it. I've got someone in mind already.

kxx

Brother can you spare $5000?

2011-11-22T15:20:00.000-05:00

Braces. Turns out Henry needs them. Why have these things not come down in price? I had braces in 1979 which set my poor (literally and figuratively) parents back about $5000. Now it turns out I have to shell out nearly the same price for Henry's treatment which will start in January. Ouch! Thank goodness Scott's insurance covers over half of it.

Hey, the kid comes by his bad teeth honestly. Scott's teeth don't meet in the front when he bites down and mine looked like a set of knocked over dominoes before my own braces. And let's not forget the headgear I had to wear to improve my nasty overbite. Even though I had a low grade headache for 5 years and I looked like some kind of Black nerd robot, I thank my parents every day for scrimping and saving for them. It was painful and long but so very necessary. How many times have you seen someone who looks nice then they smile showing a mouthful of terrible teeth? It's awful to admit but it's human nature to judge a person at first glance. For me straight teeth is and absolute a no brainer. I'll live on ramen noodles if I have to in order to pay for whatever dental work the kids need. You can get further in life with a nice smile than you may realise.

*for the record, the below photo isn't Henry... it's just an example*

So anyway, there's that. What's new with you?

kxx

Movember is nearly over

2011-11-17T15:39:00.000-05:00

I tried to get Scott to grow a moustache for the month of November. Men around here do it as a fund/awareness raiser for prostate and other men's cancers. I could never catch him before he took the razor to it as part of his morning routine. Besides, history tells me that after the 20 minutes of novelty wears off, I'd be regretting the allowance of facial hair for the entire month. Here's an example of his playoff beard. I'm reserving comment.

So to honour all those guys who died of prostate cancer (like Scott's dad) or diagnosed and in remission (like my dad), here are my favourite moustaches:

Tom Selleck rocks his moustache. For him, it's always in style on his face. In fact he looks completely bizarre without it (google it):

Technically this is a goatee, but still, the 'stache part is pretty sweet...

Who doesn't love Ned's "soup strainer?"

Creeeeepy but it suits him...

I had to add Dali. I mean, come on... pretty distinctive.

Mario!

Lanny Mcdonald

And the explainer of why time flies when you're having fun:

Quite the motley crew, eh? So whether you are moustachioed or not, have a great, safe, healthy Movember. I would have grown mine but the world is not ready to see what my upper lip has to offer. I'm not ready to see what my upper lip has to offer. But I'm with you guys in spirit.

kxx

You don't know Jack

2011-11-11T15:06:00.001-05:00

This is Scott's dad John (Jack) Kaye.

He served in the RCAF during World War II. He was a bomb aimer and flew in Lancasters Bombers. So very cool.

I'm remembering him today especially, along with all the other soldiers who fought in every war ever. Thank you so very much, Jack.

You know what makes me happy?

2011-11-09T15:30:00.000-05:00

This:

I went to Starbucks the other day and the barista gave me a ceramic mug.

It was a little thing but isn't it nice to drink out of one rather than a paper cup with a lid? She didn't even ask me if I was staying. She probably noticed that I barged in and obnoxiously put my coat down on a chair to claim a table before I joined the line-up, but still. It sure made my chai tea latte taste a whole lot better, that's for sure. And it put a smile on my face for the entire day. And just to let you know, I later paid it forward by giving up my seat on the bus to someone who came in with a friend and they wanted to sit together. I love when this stuff happens.

kxx

I'm so lucky

2011-11-03T19:11:00.000-04:00

I spent a little time on Facebook examining my friends' pages. I went to school with a lot of successful people. A couple of jobbing actors, a radio personality, and even a national news anchor. I have friends who've travelled the world and friends who live abroad in really wonderful places. Places I've always wanted to visit let alone live.

At first I felt kind of jealous looking at the photos of all my friends with really amazing lives and even better stories. Then I snapped out of it and realized how lucky I am. I have a great husband, (usually) fun, healthy kids, a great house, a nice job, a car and tons of shoes. So what if we don't have a pool or a maid? Who cares if we can only afford to holiday together every couple of years? We crack each other up, we like each other's company (and that's saying a lot what with a 15 year old boy in the mix) and we always have each other's backs. And that's what's important, right?

That and maybe having that maid...

kxx

Hi everyone!

2011-10-31T15:46:00.004-04:00

Can I say that now that I've decided to blog less, I feel more free and happy? I thought I'd be obsessed with it but I barely give it a second thought. Of course I feel a bit guilty when I haven't written in a while so here I am today. Hi!

So today is Halloween and I've spent enough blog space talking about my feelings on it. In a word (or a sound) meh. I still have kids to deal with but they're old enough to go out with their friends and leave Scott and me here to dole out candy to the greedy neighbourhood kids. Works for me.

Now, that doesn't mean to say that I didn't thoroughly enjoy The Rocky Horror Picture Show performance Saturday night. When I first heard of the 11:45pm start time I completely baulked, to be honest. I actually looked for an earlier show, knowing that 11:45 on Saturday night ordinarily is 15 minutes before falling-asleep-in-front-of-Saturday-Night-Live time. Thankfully, I was publicly named and shamed on Facebook by my buddy Nancy (hi Nancy!) into sticking to the original plan.

After the movie (and please see this awful flick in the theatre and not on dvd, for the love of God... it's all about the atmosphere) which is more of a cross between a play, Broadway musical and a good old fashioned food fight, we went straight home to bed. At 3:30am. I felt like a teenager. A teenager who soberly went to a midnight movie and came straight home. A boring, friendless, boring teenager.

We slept in until 10am Sunday morning. How embarrassing. But you know what? I love my bragging rights that we did this in the first place and I'm so looking forward to doing it again next year. But it begs the question: When did we get so flipping old?

kxx

I am so smart S-M-R-T!

2011-10-25T16:38:00.001-04:00

I'm not particularly crafty or creative so I'm super proud of what I did. Please don't burst my bubble and tell me this is a popular practice and instructions can easily be found online just yet. I'm revelling in my moment.

So I've had issues with earbuds. They irritate me to no end and it feels like my life's work to find the perfect pair that'll stay in my pin-like ear canal. Well, I've found the solution. Earplugs.

I bought a packet at the pharmacy and they're so squishy it's like stuffing your ears full of warm marshmallow. And no, I don't suggest you try that. I took the little cover off my favourite set of buds, eyeballed the size of the plugs and cut them (about in half). Then I took a paper clip and opened it up. I heated one end and pushed it through the bud, widening the opening until I could fit the noisy end of the bud into the plug. And voilà, perfect fitting earbuds. I know they won't last for long but there are 10 in a pack and they take 5 minutes to make. I'm delighted with them. I don't know how many times I've tossed earbuds just because they don't fit. Now even the cheapest pair will be perfect. I'm delighted.

So there you go. I feel so creative and smart and what was that? I can't hear you. I can't hear a thing with these earbuds in. And look at me... I'm running with them in, too!

kxx

Ready Player One

2011-10-24T21:37:00.000-04:00

Holy mackerel is this book ever good!

It was recommended to me by a friend (thanks Marc!) and it's so full of gleeful 80s references to video games, tv shows and music that I'm making a fool of myself snorting, squealing and giggling on the bus. Oh, I have to mention that I only do audiobooks since sitting down and relaxing with a book is impossible. The dishes won't wash themselves. Plus I have a particularly stabby commute in the morning and it keeps my homocidal tendencies in check. The amazing "meta" thing about this audiobook is that it's narrated by Wil Wheaton and the number of Star Trek references and mentions of Wheaton himself makes me make the goofiest noises in public.

The book is about a grim future where the population escapes their difficult lives by immersing themselves in an incredibly realistic video game. The trouble starts when the inventor of the game dies and in his will, tasks the populace to find 3 hidden Easter Eggs in order to inherit his vast fortune.

Right now I'm at a part where the main character is playing Pac-Man. He needs to play a perfect game to get the reward (eating all the dots, ghosts and power-ups without losing a life for every single one of the 256 levels). If you knew how many hours I spent at our local arcade playing that game (and Joust which also features in the book), I'd lose all credibility as the cool suburban mum you all know and love. Heh. He talks about the movie Ladyhawke which I loved, Duran Duran, an all-time fave, and so much more. They even mention Family Ties and Cap'n Crunch commercials. Fantastic!

Anyway, the book is called Ready Player One by Ernest Cline. I don't think I've enjoyed a book more in a really long time. But that's not saying much coming from someone who mostly reads fluffy romances and chick lit so please read it for yourself.

kxx

More fun on the bus and random work shit

2011-10-20T18:34:00.000-04:00

85 "Fun"

-I paid my fair as usual and waited for a transfer as usual. And waited. Nothing came out. Not really a problem but if the inspector came on the bus I'd have to pay a $150 fine. I told the driver to take note of me in case that happens. Then I sat down and watched as person after person got and she told them not to deposit their ticket as now rides were free until she could get the machine fixed. Aw, man! I was the last person to pay before the machine pegged out. No fair. At least I didn't have to pay a fine.

-I saw a baby in a stroller blowing up a latex glove like a balloon. When it fell on the dirty bus floor, the mum picked it up and gave it back. Not even I could make this stuff up, folks.

Random work shit

-At circle time my co-worker Alison pulled out a few shoelaces to tie together for a demonstration of concept. One of the children piped up and interrupted her:
"Aglet. That plastic is an aglet. A-G-L-E-T."
Holy crap, I only learned that word a few years ago after working on crosswords. I'm so impressed that this kid knew it. At 4. I'm just saying.

-I'm off today and tomorrow for Simchat Torah. It's when you come to the end of the reading of the Torah and you start again. This month there were 4 Jewish holidays plus Thanksgiving and a PD day. Alison called this week "The High Holiday Home Stretch". I love her.

-I'm enjoying this blog-writing whenever I feel there's something worth writing. It saves you (and me) from enduring a blog full of questionnaire answers, nonsensical ramblings and silly links.

See you soon...

kxx

The 85 Chronicles

2011-10-17T20:50:00.001-04:00

I figure if I'm taking the bus I may as well use it for it's valuable, valuable fodder. And boy, is there ever a lot on this route. For instance, I saw a really cool mum get on today. She was with a kid around 3 and was pierced and dressed really funky-like. I thought in passing that it would be really cool to look like that, then I realized two things:

She was young. Super young. She could only get away with that outfit if she had that baby at like 14 and that was her look in the first place
If I was to dress like that I'd seriously look like I was having a psychotic break

Then there was the scary goateed dad wearing a salt-stained ball cap and carrying an extra large Timmy's. He was tucking a pink blanket around a baby in the stroller he'd wrestled onto the bus. Then he bent down and sweetly wiped the face of a little blond girl. With his licked thumb. Her cheeks were covered in chocolate from the giant cookie she was holding. At 7:30 in the morning. I don't even know where to go with that tableau. Cute yet creepy with just a soupçon of yikes. Love the 85. Stay tuned for more crazy.

kxx

His pants are on fire. Again.

2011-10-13T11:29:00.000-04:00

We're having another issue with Elliott. I won't get into too much detail but he got caught in a lie AGAIN. The thing is, the things he's choosing to fib about aren't a big deal. He could tell the truth just as easily and not get into half as much trouble as he's in now. So why make the choice to lie, get into tons of shit for no reason, piss us off all night, subject himself to hours of lecturing, have privileges removed and make it so I can't stand to be in the same room with him? What is wrong with this kid? I feel like we're doing a really shitty parental job.

Oh and I just posted this photo to his Facebook wall with no comment. Maybe he'll get that I'm fed up. But to be honest I really don't think he will...

kxx

Happy Thanksgiving!

2011-10-10T13:33:00.000-04:00

Some people eat the big dinner on Sunday, and some today. Due to other commitments, we're having ours today sandwiched between a hockey game and a cadet band practice. A gal's gotta do what a gal's gotta do.

So the menu for today is turkey, stuffing, roasted potatoes, Caesar salad, macaroni and cheese (an anomaly, I know) and apple pie for dessert. I know, right? Watch me go all traditional on Thanksgiving's ass. We're not having that gross sweet potato pie with the marshmallows on top. Can I get a yuck on that? We all agree on the vileness that is cranberry sauce and really, anything green (besides salad), is just asking for table whining and idle threats. "Eat that broccoli or else", "Just one more bite and you can leave the table". UGH. Why not just feed them what they like and give thanks for a pleasant dinner? Am I right?

Have a good one!

kxx

Things I forgot about working in Preschool

2011-10-06T17:56:00.000-04:00

Little kids are funny: Like today in the washroom when I was told that "last night I had corn on the cob and now my poo looks like brown corn on the cob."

Little kids are curious: Like the time I was asked "are you brown everywhere?"

Little kids are easily amused: Like today when I had 6 three year olds completely enraptured for 20 minutes by covering 4 toys with a cloth and lifting it up after I took one away. They were delighted trying to guess what was missing.

Little kids get easily frustrated: Like when we had to deal with a full on tantrum because he couldn't get his backpack open.

Little kids say the cutest things: Like at snacktime when I got called "mummy"

All in all I'm having a great time there. Never let anyone say it's just playing all day or babysitting. I develop programmes to enrich the development of preschoolers. I have to pick the exact right words to say to ensure a positive learning atmosphere and... oh heck, who am I kidding? It's fun. Work, mind you, but fun.

kxx

My happy place

2011-10-04T18:16:00.001-04:00

So I was thinking the other day about places that make me happy. I haven't been to many places in the world so pretty much it would be London since besides Ottawa I'm most comfortable there. But really, when I think about it, my happy place is a lot closer than that. In fact, I'm there right now. My living room.

Think about this. I've got the tv remote control within arm's reach. I'm not on the couch right now but I can be in less than a second. In fact, I think I can jump it from here. Let's see... I can. From the computer desk I'm... hold on I'm going to count... 8 steps from the fridge and wait a sec... 12 steps from the toilet. On tv, arguably Buffy's best episode "Once More With Feeling". In the oven, two home-made pizzas for dinner. Seriously, I'm in heaven. My feet are a little cold but yup, heaven.

Who is rich? One who is satisfied with what one has. Looks like I'm loaded, baby!

kxx

Halloween is coming!

2011-09-30T11:31:00.001-04:00

I put an exclamation point at the end of that sentence even though I don't feel particularly excited about he prospect of stupid Halloween. There are reasons that I previously explained here and here.

I work in a Jewish preschool and I'm praying that they don't celebrate. How wonderful would it be if I didn't have to spend a whole workday pretending to love dressing up and gorging on candy I don't love but will eat because it's there. That's why I love these contacts and horns so much.

They take no effort and throw them on no matter what you have on and voilà... costume. Also, I was shaving my head this morning and realized I could also do a modified male pattern baldness thing, so if I have to I can do that. If I have to. Again, no effort involved to be an elderly demon or something. Of course I work in a preschool and being responsible for perhaps thousands of dollars of post traumatic stress disorder psychotherapy is not part of my job description. So maybe the eyes and horns are out anyway.

Audrey wants to be a gypsy and already has her costume so that's something I don't have to think about. Elliott's going to a party and wants to wear his "ironic ghost" costume again so that's a plus so this year I only have to deal with Henry in terms of a costume.

I wonder if he'd let me near him with my hair clippers?

kxx

I learned something!

2011-09-27T21:14:00.000-04:00

Look at this! This is SO. COOL. I was mentioning to a friend that I can never remember which side my gas tank is on. She told me that if I looked at that little arrow beside the gas gauge inside the car, I can avoid choosing the wrong side each and every time, requiring an embarrassing 3 point turn in the middle of the service station. Have you ever done this? Flammable gas pumps, people darting from out of nowhere, kids filling their tires with air, pissed off people waiting to get into my vacated spot... yes, I'm that girl.

Anyway, this stupid little arrow will save me a lot of stress and humiliation and keep a lot of grouchy Ottawans from spraining their rolling eyes as they watch me make yet another 3 point turn in the middle of, well, everything.

kxx

What the hell are you wearing, woman?

2011-09-23T17:46:00.001-04:00

So a few weeks ago I bought a pair of skinny jeans. Unfortunately when I put them on I didn't get any skinnier but they did look okay so I took the leap and bought them. I'm still on the fence about them and the irony there is I couldn't even scale, let alone get to the top of a fence while I'm wearing them. I can barely sit down. They are snug. Spanx snug.

I have no idea how to wear them. I seem to feel the need to wear mini dresses and long tops so that they look like tights. Or jeggings. Or whatever. I usually wear them with ballet flats but today I thought I'd try Converse. I chickened out when I looked in the mirror and saw a mutton dressed as a lamb and it was back to the ballet flats for me. It's enough that I'm a curvy girly in these sausage casing pants. I didn't need to look like a freaking 17 year old, fat, Black, lesbian, Justin Bieber fan.

Anyway, I'm still hot and cold on them. It definitely depends on my state of mind before I squeeze myself into them. That's one thing in the "pros" column about these pants. Nothing jiggles when they're on. I just have to ignore the spots that appear and disappear in my periphery after wearing them for a few hours. A definite "con". As I type this I've already switched to sweatpants. Blessed blessed sweatpants.

kxx

What a week (reprise)

2011-09-21T16:32:00.000-04:00

It seems like I post this every week but when am I going to have 2 evenings in a row with all of us at home at 6pm? I think I'm spoiled since in our lives together, we've had the bulk of our dinners. We sat and ate a meal I'd lovingly ~~slaved over~~ cooked and we talked about our days, joked, watched tv (yes, I know...) and generally just enjoyed each other. Fantastic.

All summer at least one of us has been gone every single night. There have been sleepovers, playdates, sporting events and concerts. Meetings, appointments, parties and get-togethers. It's especially bad when it's me since I'm the dinner maker. When I don't cook the rest of them have sandwiches and/or leftovers for dinner. And I can't even explain to you the guilt I feel when I'm having fun paddling, knowing that everyone at home is having cheese and crackers for dinner. Ugh.

This week is the same. Monday was Curriculum Night at my preschool and I had to be there by 6:30. Tuesday night was dragonboat for me and hockey for Elliott. Today we have Audrey's guitar lesson from 5:30-6:30 and Elliott has a parent/teacher conference at 7pm. Tomorrow Audrey and Henry have their school conference from 5-7pm. Imagine that... over dinner again. And what's this I see? Dinner together on Friday? Don't bank on it. It's free as of this moment but it's still early.

I'm so tired.

kxx

Ack! I haven't posted since Wednesday?

2011-09-19T15:13:00.000-04:00

Sorry everyone! My new job keeps me hopping and even though it's part time, I still have to cram everything I would have done all day into a few hours. Plus there's homework, cooking/baking, the new fall television season is starting... something had to give.

In fact, I've been finding that my creative juices have been drying up over the past 5 years of blogging and while I'll never stop writing, I think I need to blog a little less. There are times when I'll write one of my terrible stream-of-consciousness blogs and apologize to the ether as I click the "publish" button. I need to work on getting my groove back. Or actually getting a groove in the first place.

I've always thought that if I miss even one blog, I'd lose rafts of readers. But I think that writing shitty posts may do that faster. Besides, I didn't start this blog to satisfy lots of readers. It was to fulfill myself.

I'm going to start blogging only when I have something cool/funny/interesting to share. The focus, as always will be me. I'm sticking with the adage "write what you know" and the only thing I'm an expert on is yours truly, so... there you go.

I'll still be writing most of the week, trust me. You can't get rid of me that easily. I'll definitely do fewer Wordless Wednesday posts and cut out the Flashback Fridays altogether. At first it was a way to get you to read my older, cleverer posts but I say to you with every kindness and respect: "read the archives yourselves, you lazy so-and-so's".

So off you go... enjoy your days. There's nothing to see here. Literally. I have some baking to do for a parent/teacher thing we have at the school tonight and I have to make dinner as well, help the kids with their homework, show the kids and my husband that I actually remember who they are, and try to get a good night's sleep and do it all over again in the morning. You know, the usual stuff.

See you tomorrow. Maybe. ;-)

kxx

Not very Wordless Wednesday

2011-09-14T19:56:00.000-04:00

I'm not a dog lover but there is something about Bostons. Looka dat face! They're small and kinda weird looking. Like a certain blogger we're all familiar with. If (and that's a BIG "if") I ever get a dog, this'll be the brand. Wait... it's not a brand when it comes to dogs, is it? It's ummmm.... BREED. Yes, breed. See? I should never own a dog.

kxx

I think I'm going to like this semester.

2011-09-13T17:02:00.000-04:00

Elliott has only started grade 10 a week ago and I'm seeing something interesting. He actually seems to like a class. It's quite the switch from previous years when he would have named phys-ed, recess, music, and shop as his favourites. Ah, my high achiever.

Anyway, since school started he's been crowing on and on (and on) about history and his history teacher. He'll be studying Canadian history from the First World War until the '80s. I'm delighted that he's taken to it so much. He wouldn't stop talking about it in the car the other day and to see his eyes sparkle about school... Finally!

Today he showed me a handout that the teacher gave him. It had me howling. It's "If World War I Was A Bar Fight". With a teacher like this, and Elliott already this engaged, I can't wait for the rest of the year.

kxx

kxx

I'm invincibile!

2011-09-12T20:58:00.000-04:00

There are many things that happen in a mother's life that make her feel like she can do anything. It can be as simple as writing a letter from the tooth fairy explaining why she didn't come last night... something to do with air speed and time of tooth loss and nothing at all to do with her drinking too much wine and passing out on the couch at 9pm. Another example could be oh, say, baking cookies for a certain lifeguard 10 minutes before the kids' final swimming lesson.

Last week that Supermum feeling extended to my new daycare job. A boy asked me to open one of those cheese string packets. I did and handed it back to him. Unfortunately I hadn't opened it to his satisfaction and as he pulled out the cheese, about an inch of the cheese broke inside the packet.

Him (crestfallen): My cheese is broken! Fix it!!
Me: Oh, sweetie, it still tastes yummy in two pieces, don't worry. (HA. Imagine trying to be reasonable with a 4 year old...)
Him: My cheese is broken!! FIX IT!!
Me (Uh oh... I take the pieces and squish the two parts together and precariously hand it back): See there you go. All fixed!
Him: THAT'S NOT FIXED!

Hoo boy. I was in trouble. As I looked at the pieces in my hand I did the only thing I could think of with that little one inch bit.

I palmed it.

Me (I handed back the woefully short cheese with a flourish and held my breath): Ta da! It was tricky but I attached them again. There you go!
Him (examining it suspiciously then breaking into a smile): Thank you Morah Karen!

Disaster averted.

And now I know for sure that my many years of stellar mothering will translate into a successful career in daycare. Now I just need a couple of tricks to dispose of chunks of food hidden up my sleeve.

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-09-09T21:45:00.000-04:00

I'm watching old episodes of MasterChef on PVR and I'm listening for a word that pops out and that word is... "attitude".

So please read about Elliott's first crummy grade from February 2006. Prophetically, it wasn't his last and strangely, he's gone on to be very proficient on the sax and the bagpipes. Go figure.

kxx

Do I have to be Muslim to issue a fatwa?

2011-09-08T15:59:00.000-04:00

Because if not, someone at OC Transpo is in all kinds of trouble.

I've been thrust into the world of public transit due to this new job. Fine. No matter that I had to be up at 5:45 in order to run before work. Explaining why I run before work and not after a part time job that has me home by 2pm is another blog.

So my first day (Tuesday) went like this:

5:45- alarm goes off
5:55- tear myself out of bed, dress for the run, pound a glass of water and stumble outside
6am- haul my carcass for 5k then cool down by walking around the park. Look, a heron!
7am- shower, dress, put my face on, have breakfast, pack my lunch, head out the door for the bus.
7:40- catch the 152, transferring once to the 85, listening to a podcast along the way
8:20- arrive at work stress free. Wonderful way to start the day.

Wednesday went like this:

5:45- alarm goes off
5:55- tear myself out of bed, dress for the run, pound a glass of water and stumble outside
6am- haul my carcass 5k then cool down by walking around the park. Look, a heron (I think it was the same one as yesterday)
7am- shower, dress, put on my face, have breakfast, pack my lunch, head out the door for the bus.

Here's where things go horribly, horribly awry. Instead of taking the first transfer, I decided to walk. I thought (first mistake... stop thinking, stupid brain) that I could take a nice walk and reduce my buses by half. I got to the transfer point in plenty of time. In fact I arrived at roughly the same time that yesterday's bus did. I guess that was a big "roughly" because I waited and waited and waited. Watching bus after bus that isn't yours going by has to be the worst feeling in the world. When mine finally came it meandered down the road, picking barely ambulatory people up at every stop. If I never hear the beep beep of the "kneeling bus" again, it'll be too soon.

8:30 (the time I start work)- I'm officially freaking out. I stop my Nerdist podcast and I'm having an embolism trying to Scanners everyone waiting for the bus along the route. If there were headless bodies just lying at the stops he wouldn't have to pick them up anymore, am I right?
8:37 (7 minutes late)- futilely texting my boss telling her that I'm late (no d'uh) and that I'm beyond sorry and embarrassed. After all, it's only my second flipping day at this job.
8:42 (12 minutes late)- finally arrive at work. I'm fuming, stressed out and have a headache starting behind my eyes. Wonderful way to start the day.

Today went better. Unfortunately I was so scared I'd be late again that I set the clock for 5:30 (help me, Baby Jesus... I've gone from a summer of sleeping in until 9 to a blaring alarm clock at the ass-crack of dawn). So yes, I got there on time today (in fact 20 minutes early *eyeroll*) but at what cost? It's 3:30 and I'm just about ready for bed. And I have dragonboat in 3 hours. Sigh.

kxx

(Nearly) Wordless Wednesday

2011-09-07T22:16:00.001-04:00

This is so funny!

What we SHOULD have been taught in our senior year at high school. Let me just add that as good Canadians, we learned the metric system. All the other subjects still stand.

kxx

Granny Panties!

2011-09-06T16:18:00.000-04:00

I showered and dressed this morning and reached my hand into my unmentionables drawer. I fished around in the dark (remember it's 5:45am and the house is still sleeping) and pulled out what I thought was a t-shirt. Before I could wonder why a t-shirt was in my incredibly organised (HA!) drawer, I realized I was clutching a previously dreaded granny panty.

When I was younger, after bucking it for years, I was all about the thong. I even blogged about the first time I tried one out. That phase lasted for years. After that I went for "boy shorts". Those didn't work out so well when I found they didn't go high enough in the waist. There's nothing like getting a glimpse of yourself in the mirror looking like John Goodman in short shorts. Brrr. There are sights that you can never unsee no matter how hard you try. I'm looking into hypnotism to deal with the trauma.

Then came the final realization that grannies have really got something here. They cover the unsightly "beer gut" (thanks, kids) and they never, ever ride up. So what if it looks like I'm wearing a one piece bathing suit when I'm fully undied up but when I bend down in my hip huggers, you'll only see my black Fruit Of The Looms and not my ass crack. Score.

I think we have a winner, folks. I mean, after 23 years, who am I trying to seduce? I've got the guy. I'm well past middle age so I deserve to be comfortable under my clothes if nowhere else (I'm looking at you 2 hour Louboutins). So it's granny panties for the win.

kxx

Happy Anniversary!

2011-09-05T17:46:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was the 23rd anniversary of the day that Scott and I first met.

I'm not one of those "anniversary women". You know the ones who think that the first time you held hands or the first time you shared a milkshake is cause for celebration. And God help him if he forgets the first time you washed your undies in the same machine.

But when it comes to this anniversary, it's really important to me. We don't exchange gifts or cards like we do for our wedding anniversary but there's an unspoken understanding that if not for this anniversary, there would be no others. No wedding, no house, no kids, no cat no nothing. Zilch. Plus, I put in 5 looooonnng years before our actual wedding day and to discount all that time would cause a cosmic rift in the continuum of time and space where we'd be thrown headlong into the untempered schism of... what? Heh. Too much Doctor Who this weekend.

So Happy 23rd Anniversary, lovey! You know I think you hung the moon. For what it's worth, this is the anniversary of us and our life together. That wedding thing was just a part of the journey that started on that fateful day.

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-09-02T21:14:00.000-04:00

Woo hoo! Long weekend!

What to do... what to do...

I know! A flashback post about holidays, of course.

Not exactly the Labour Day holiday but I thought it was amusing. It was from August 2009. See you Monday. Enjoy the last long weekend of the summer. If you need me I'll be crying into my tank tops.

kxx

What's in your purse?

2011-09-01T23:32:00.001-04:00

I own lots of handbags. In fact, I have more purses than shoes and that's saying a lot. I won't go into specifics but let's say I have at least 2 in every colour on the colour wheel. At least two of every colour. So naturally I change purses quite often. In fact today since I was going to a couple of different places for a couple of different occasions I used two different ones and had to empty the big one out to use the small one.

I went to work today with one of my biggest bags. Wanna know what was inside? Thought so.

-2 chapsticks (one cherry, one regular)

- a bottle of hand sanitiser

- a container of hand lotion

- face powder

- perfume (Clean Shower Fresh)

- Stila cheek and lip stain

- my wallet (14 cards, $10, a blank cheque and a $20 cheque I keep meaning to cash)

- my cell

- my iTouch

- earbuds

- a file folder containing a bunch of paperwork

- 2 packs of gum

- a packet of Listerine Pocket Packs (hm... worried about bad breath much?)

- a pen

- an mp3/ cell charger

- a camera

- keys

- eyeglasses

- prescription sunglasses

- packet of kleenex
- a black hoodie

- my business cards (they were funnier when I didn't actually have a job)

- a bagel with cream cheese

- an apple

-a travel mug of tea

And that's the contents of my bag. Wasn't that illuminating? What can you take away from my purse contents psychologically? Well, that I like soft and clean hands and I worry about my lips and breath. Also I don't get too hungry during the day and I obviously have a big-ass, heavy bag. It looks a lot like this:

Now let me get to bed so I can get the energy to haul this around one more day...

kxx

Wordless Wednesday

2011-08-31T22:38:00.000-04:00

For you, Al!

kxx (HA!)

Crazy busy day!

2011-08-30T17:39:00.000-04:00

I had a staff meeting and CPR refresher at work from 9-4. This was after my 5K run at 6am and before my dragonboat practice at 6:30pm.

Poor kids. They didn't see me all day, I came home and threw some leftover bagels and lox at them and now I'm blogging really quickly before I change clothes and run out to practice. Today I feel like an awful mother. I know we all have those days but wow, do I feel guilty. This is why I'm so glad my work is normally half days. Gotta go...

kxx

"So how many convictions have you had?"

2011-08-29T14:20:00.000-04:00

That had to be the strangest question ever put to me in my entire life.

So I was at the police station today... wait, that sounds weird.

So on my way to get fingerprinted... wow, not so great either. You all need a background and some context for this not to sound all felon-y.

Because my new job (that I start tomorrow... wheee!) is with children, I needed to complete a police check. I did the paperwork and when it came back there was a disturbing red flag attached. Apparently someone with my name or birthday has been a naughty girl (or boy, I don't judge). Supposedly this happens quite a bit and it's resolved by going to get fingerprinted at the police station. Lots of things went through my mind but "COOL!" was the main thing.

When my number got called, the woman escorting me to the room made the weirdest small-talk by asking "so how many convictions have you had?". Wow. Talk about shitty bedside manner. After my attack of nervous giggles, I replied that I was just there to follow up on my police check.

She took me to a room that I hoped would look more like something from every police drama I've ever seen. Instead it looked like something from every office comedy I've ever seen. After I filled in yet another form, I excitedly waited for the ink blotter to come out. Ridiculously, I was more excited than anyone should be while awaiting fingerprinting. I'm such a dork.

When the time came, she put on rubber gloves, wiped my fingers with a wet wipe and gingerly placed each one on... the glass of a computer scanner. What? Way to disillusion the noob.

So I went all the way down to the cop shop, didn't see any person scarier than a guy that looked like Dwight from The Office; or any cop more intimidating than Mike from Mike And Molly and then I don't even get black fingers like a common criminal? Hmph. What a disappointment.

kxx

I'm watching cartoons with Henry

2011-08-26T23:12:00.001-04:00

It's just before bed and Henry and I are watching GI Joe as we do every weeknight. I just remembered that I hadn't blogged today so I thought I'd use GI Joe as my search word for Flashback Friday.

I talked about the deplorable lack of violence in cartoons. Specifically, the fact that they chop my favourite funny violent acts so much that the "stories" no longer make sense. Or I inevitably yell out "what happened to his exploding cigar??" Put them back, I lamented in this blog from March 2011...

See you Monday, precious peeps...

Emergency trip to Montreal

2011-08-25T19:27:00.000-04:00

Okay, it wasn't really an emergency. When I got back from London, we realized we hadn't seen my dad who lives 2 hours away in Montreal since Christmas. Yikes! I start work next week, the kids start school after Labour Day and lo and behold we had 2 days in a row with nothing on our schedule. We quickly made up our minds and here we are.

Today we went to the Biodome, Insectarium and Botanical Gardens. We had a really fun day but there was a LOT of walking! It was nice to see my old stomping grounds and share some funny stories with the kids. I don't get the chance as often as Scott does since we live in his hometown.

Anyway, gotta fly, I promised my dad I'd set him up with a Facebook account but told him I had to do some preliminary research first. Apparently blogging is now Facebook research. Deal with it.

kxx

(Mostly) Wordless Wednesday

2011-08-24T09:53:00.000-04:00

Pictures!

Can I come with you?

The costume of the most famous Doctor.

The most recent Doctor, Matt Smith.

Enjoying tea and a magazine in the garden. It was a gorgeous place to sit.

My godson and Postman Pat. No sign of Jess...

Mein hosts.

Now with Cousin Francis

I baked these with a hand mixer... I hope Terra doesn't get jealous!

What is he thinking?

The big show!

The parents and godparents relax.

Party time!

kxx

The trip was amazing!

2011-08-23T20:04:00.000-04:00

The highlight was the christening, of course, where I drank too much wine and fell asleep in my clothes. Photos and details (not of the end of the evening, naturally) tomorrow. But I have to mention the Doctor Who Experience. It was FANTASTIC!

I canNOT say enough about this exhibit. It was fun and funny, interactive, interesting and completely and totally amazing. Even Kathy, who had never seen an episode, seemed to enjoy herself. Who wouldn't love taking a spin in the TARDIS? It's staying in London until Christmas then is heading over to Wales where it'll stay permanently. Every part of it was a scream, a trip, a complete joy. I'm so glad I got to go.

So it looks like I've officially embraced my geekdom. I freely admit I'm not a fan of all sci-fi but when I do love one of these shows, I love it more than anything. I want to learn and absorb everything about it. It's not like that with any other genre of show for me. And the new series of Doctor Who (starting with Christopher Eggleston) makes me more happy than a mere television show should.

Now if only I had a time machine of my own. After I'd invest in the internet, I'd totally go back there for another go-round.

kxx

I'm home!

2011-08-22T11:43:00.000-04:00

See, like I said whirlwind. I'm actually not back yet, my plane doesn't land until 5:50 this evening but I knew I'd be tired and have a ton of ~~shopping~~ luggage to unpack so the blog would be at the back of my mind. Not to worry, you'll get the story and a few photos tomorrow.

Now off you go so I can get my wits (such as they are) about me.

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-08-19T11:08:00.005-04:00

Since I'm across the pond right now, I thought my search word for today should reflect that. The word for today is London. D'uh...

This was posted in April 2008. See? I seem to go there every year. The post was Scott's clever travel tip to beat jet lag.

See you Monday!

kxx

I'm on my way!

2011-08-18T10:29:00.001-04:00

I've pre-programmed this to come out as I wing my way to Ye Olde London Town. I'm so excited! A few weeks ago I went to Toronto and I felt like a fish out of water but in London I can whip from the airport to the underground no problem. I'm really comfortable there. When I was younger I wanted to move there more than anything and I still love all things British. Except for the weather thing. Yes, I have to go through 7 months of cold that freezes your eyelashes together, but nothing beats an Ottawa summer where it's 23C with 100% humidity making it feel like 38C. Over there, the same 23C feels like 15C because of the cool and damp. UGH.

Anyway, I've got a nice warm sweater and a sweet leather jacket and I'm ready for anything. I'll be posting Facebook updates whenever I can and stay tuned next week for a breakdown of my whirlwind trip.

kxx

Not so Wordless Wednesday

2011-08-17T10:14:00.001-04:00

Every so often the stars align and my silly little "phd" camera (press here, dummy) captures something that's almost worth framing. I saw Audrey and the boys lying on the trampoline talking and laughing together. A rare occurrence in itself. I grabbed my little pink nightmare and hoped for something usable. After 5 minutes of snapping asses and blurs, goofy mugging and ridiculous demands ("take a picture of my foot!"), I got a few keepers. I plan to take them to the UK to show everyone how lovely my kids really are. If only they knew the real truth...

kxx

I don't think you know

2011-08-16T11:03:00.000-04:00

On Wednesday night I leave for the UK. I'm going to be a godmother for the second time to my "cousin" and his christening is Sunday. Cousin is in quotes because our relationship is so complicated I have to have it slowly explained to me complete with genealogical diagrammes every time I see him. Basically we're related on my dad's side, with my best friend forever thrown into the mix for good measure. Now that's another long story.

Anyway, I leave Wednesday for the shortest trip I've ever taken over there. I arrive back on these shores on Monday afternoon. Because this trip is so short, my BFF Kathy has filled my time with activities including a lunch with her workmates as soon as I touch down (I'm assuming with my suitcase in tow), shopping trips and cupcake baking. And of course the baptism. Besides that auspicious event, the only thing I'm really looking forward to is the Doctor Who Experience. I'm beside myself with joy.

I've not been a fan of Doctor Who for long. I'd watched the odd episode from behind my couch when I was a kid but it wasn't until the recent revamp that my love took off. I can't get enough of it. When I found out that there was an exhibit on in London for a limited time I resigned myself to to not going. Then my favourite cousin was destined to be christened and the stars all lined up. I'm beyond excited.

Years ago I went to the Star Trek Experience in Las Vegas and it was fantastic. It was part ride, part museum exhibit and all amazing. Even my sister-in-law, who came with us and had only seen a handful of original series episodes, still talks about it. Kathy is in for a massive treat. Only she doesn't know it yet. And isn't that the best kind of surprise?

I know you're reading this Kathy... you'll have a ball, I promise or I'll repay your entry fee. See you Thursday!

kxx

Happy Monday!

2011-08-15T20:13:00.000-04:00

I post this video every few months but I can't resist. I love this song. Especially on a day like today where I have absolutely nothing interesting to blog. So sorry but it's the end of the day and the family is all comfortably ensconced in the living room without me. Tomorrow I promise to blog earlier so I can write something creative. I watched Glee 3D with Audrey this afternoon so that's what I'm blaming for my lack of bloggitude.

Look at the clip. This little boy was part of the movie... I mean, can you blame me? I wanted to take this little boy home!

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-08-12T23:09:00.000-04:00

I nearly forgot to post again! Today it wasn't because I was bummed, I just got busy. I feel much more happy today and my flashback post talks about being cheerful in the face of someone who doesn't like you. Hard work.

April 26, 2006

Just a sidebar: Hugh has since moved away with his family to BC. I'll never run into him again. Which puts our arch-nemesis status on hold. Too bad. How often can you say you have an arch-nemesis?

kxx

Feeling... well, weird

2011-08-11T23:57:00.000-04:00

I've been feeling very strange all day. A little on the weepy side, a little on the angry side since about 10 this morning. I wasn't going to write a blog for today but it's been nagging at me the last hour so here it is. It's not good but it's done. I'm not sure why I feel so strange. Aunt Flo's not due and I had a nice birthday yesterday. It's just one of those things. I think a good night's sleep will solve everything. You know what it's like to feel like the end of a day can't come quickly enough...

kxx

Happy Birthday to ME!

2011-08-10T15:48:00.001-04:00

I'm 44 today. Let's catalogue my aches and pains, shall we?

Soreness under my left kneecap
Constant ache in the muscle between my neck and right shoulder
My sinuses get completely stuffed up after 5pm
I have an ache in my right big toe that sometimes makes it hard to wear heels (waaah!)
I think I have the beginnings of carpal tunnel in my left forearm
My right eye is constantly leaking
Lately an alarming snore (from what Scott tells me) that leads me to think deviated septum

That's about it. Pretty good for an old broad, I have to admit. I'm still mobile and nothing I do is really painful so it's all good.

What about what I CAN do?

Run 5K without stopping
Dragonboat well enough to earn a medal or two
Do 25 "boy pushups"
Bake a pretty mean cake
Wear a different pair of shoes every day for 2 months without repeats
I'm a fairly good mum and a pretty okay wife

So there you have it. The aches and accomplishments of a more than middle-aged, Black suburban wife and mother. I think it's pretty fabulous.

kxx

An open letter

2011-08-09T12:25:00.000-04:00

To Everyone With Whom I Converse on a Regular Basis,

People, we've gone through this before. You know I love technology as much as the next person. You read my blog, we're friends on Facebook, MySpace, LinkedIn, Flickr, Picasa, Gmail, Google+, you name it. I'm on the computer at least 20 hours a week and even when I worked on a computer all day I still came home and computed half the night. As you are well aware, I'm a child of the computer age.

So when you ask if I've watched So You Think You Can Dance and I say "no but I taped it", stop laughing. You have to know I don't mean an actual VCR with an actual cassette. It's just what I'm used to saying. Telling you that I'm going home to watch So You Think You Can Dance on PVR doesn't roll off my tongue.

Here are some other things I may say. Please control yourselves:

"Just leave a message on my answering machine". No, I don't have a machine with a tape beside my telephone.

"The policemen/firemen/mailmen are on strike so I won't get arrested when I set fire to that mailbox!" This is just an example, people.

"OMG, I love that record!" As a matter of fact I have a 32g iPod touch that holds mp3 files of every "record" and "tape" that I've ever owned.

Stop judging me. I really am a modern girl. It's just that at my advanced age (44 as of tomorrow), I can't be bothered to think too long before I speak. I could go at any minute and I can't spare the time. It takes too long to mentally come up with those new-fangled terms but, trust me, I know what the "real" things are.

So please keep your sniggering to yourself.

Sincerely,
Karen Kaye

"Mum, this was the best night of the summer"

2011-08-08T21:02:00.000-04:00

This is what Henry said to me after we all came home from partying on Saturday night.

We went to a big 40th birthday party that night. And I mean big. After the huge dinner (and the bellydancer, and the fireworks... did I mention this was a biiiig party?), they rolled out the dance floor. As the first strains of Lady Gaga boomed out of the speakers, I could see Henry start to tap his feet. Then he started to wiggle. I asked him if he wanted to go dance but he shrugged his shoulders. But those shoulders never stopped moving. "Come on! I'll go with you" I said, and off we went. Surprisingly we had never before been in a dancing situation like that before. I have never properly danced with my kids. How did that happen? Growing up I loved to dance.

We danced and danced. That kid had some sweet dance moves. He spun, and shimmied and boogied his little heart out. He got so sweaty and so into it that he reminded me how much I loved to dance. Don't get me wrong, neither of us will be contestants on So You Think You Can Dance anytime soon (unless it's the gag auditions) but it looks like we both enjoy flailing madly. And trust me, I will bend over backwards to arrange a situation where we can dance together again.

I agree, kiddo. Best night of the summer.

kxx

The most amazing thing I ever saw

2011-08-05T21:41:00.000-04:00

Elliott asked me this afternoon what the most amazing thing I ever saw was. What a hard question! I hemmed and hawed a bit and then he jumped in.

"My birth?"

HA! Um, no. Frankly I didn't see much of that. The labour was so long and I was so drugged up I really couldn't care less. And I had a c-section so there was a sheet up over the important bits and I was at the wrong end of the action anyway. So no.

I thought and thought. I'd seen the Northern Lights once. I saw a comet like a rock on fire a few years ago. That was super cool. I thought about my feeling at the finish line of every dragonboat race I'd ever had. All those things were really neat but if you think about it, amazing is such a weighty word.

Scott was leaving for hockey just then. He kissed me goodbye, hugged Elliott and went to shake his hand. Suddenly they started doing that thing that guys do, each trying to crush the other's hand. They were laughing so loudly and honestly and when Elliott was finally lying on the floor laughing and groaning in joy and pain, looking up at Scott with such love in his eyes, I knew.

AMAZING.

kxx

Exciting day for a Thursday

2011-08-04T15:31:00.000-04:00

Audrey and I are getting glammed up to go downtown to see The Lion King. I'm wearing my Louboutins and everything. They are the perfect footwear for spending the evening sitting down.

On the way to the show, I have to stop by the canoe club to take part in an interview with my team about our dragonboat triumph at the ICF World Crew Championships in Toronto. See how I threw in the official name? If you have no idea what I'm on about, I'll refer you to every single blog post I wrote last week. The interview is for a local newspaper and it should be interesting to see what they'll make of me in my white jeans and designer footwear down at the riverside.

kxx

Okay!

2011-08-03T19:37:00.001-04:00

After yesterday's unfortunate overshare, I thought I'd try for something less um... uriny? Is that a thing? Well, it is now.

It's about a movie I love. It's not my favourite, it's not the best and it's certainly not famous. It's Now, Voyager starring Bette Davis. It's pretty formulaic and there are plot points that wouldn't happen nowadays. For instance the main character, unbeknownst to his wife, practically hands his daughter over to his secret lover Bette Davis to take care of so that they can be together in even some small way.

What is it about this movie? I've seen it about 10 times and I cry buckets each and every time. I once counted my goopy kleenexes after it was over and my all-time high was 11. I'm talking a total breakdown complete with sobbing and wailing. I do know what it is. It's the sacrifice that everyone makes for everyone else. It's almost too much to bear. And Bette Davis' character? She's a full-on saint. Except for the falling in love with a married man thing.

I got a lot out of that movie. I first saw it in the 80s. I smoked back then and often lit other peoples' cigarettes for them the way Paul Henreid did.

I thought Bette Davis' hair was short in the back so I cut and styled my hair to look just like it does after her makeover. It was the 80s and trust me, that was a cool hairstyle. Who knew it was all pinned up and not shaved back there? You see what you want to see.

I even owned a couple of finches and named them Camille and Jerry after the main characters. I could NOT get enough of this movie.

I haven't watched it in years and I'm actually a bit afraid to. What if it's silly or it just plain sucks? My memory isn't what it used to be and I just may be romanticizing how wonderful it is. After all, it's not a classic for a reason, right?

If any of you have seen it in recent years, please post and let me know if I should re-watch it. I own the dvd but I still haven't played it. Tell me if it's still worth my swooning over Paul Henreid's blatant disregard of the surgeon general's warning.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehYrqpwJelY

Hmph. I was trying to embed the trailer and blogger won't let me. But click in the link above and it'll be right there...

kxx

Well, this is a new one.

2011-08-02T18:25:00.000-04:00

Scott and I have been talking about getting a trampoline all summer. It's great cardio and the kids would get a kick out of it. We have plenty of room in the backyard and it seemed like a nice idea. Then summer got in the way, we got busy with activities and we just plain forgot.

Last week I got a Canadian Tire flyer in my inbox where trampolines were 35% off. Plus you got a $50 gift card. So today we packed the kids up and made a trampoline run.

***no need to insert the comedy montage of us installing things upside down, fast-motion chasing each other with socket wrenches or shrugging comedically over handfuls of spare screws... we actually did pretty well and installed it completely farce-free in a couple of hours ***

Anyway, onto my indignity. I was having the inaugural bounce once it was all up and I noticed... well... I'm just going to put it out there. I was peeing a little everytime my feet hit the mat. Oh, happy day. So what's that make it? Laughing, coughing, sit-ups, just plain holding a full bladder and now this. Time to put on my big girl (waterproof) panties and buy those Depends.

This getting old thing is getting old.

kxx

Holiday Monday!

2011-08-01T13:31:00.000-04:00

My plan for today is to make frosting. Six batches of buttercreme for the cupcakes I have to deliver on Friday That's it. I already exercised (a 6k jaunt to the beach with my boys), and watched my soaps so now it's time to work. Well, as much work as using my gorgeous mixer to whip up a batch of sweet creamy goodness is work...

However you spend your Civic Holiday, have fun at it and be safe. Don't forget it's the penultimate long weekend of the summer so you have to enjoy the hell out of it. It's a rule.

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-07-29T11:35:00.001-04:00

Obviously since this was dragonboat week, today's search word will be (d'uh) dragonboat. Have a fantastic weekend and I'll see you with a pile of fresh and hopefully dragonboat-free posts next week.

This post is from April 2006. It was the first time I ever mentioned dragonboating in this blog. Kinda boring to tell you the truth.

kxx

CN Tower

2011-07-28T11:24:00.000-04:00

I have been to Toronto to see a show, to go to Caribana and to visit family. I'd never been there to sightsee. Our team had Friday off and everyone else had been there before but I really wanted to see the world from the top of the CN Tower.

The fee was extortionate lines were ridiculous (especially when you're by yourself) but the view was fantastic.

I'm glad I went but I wouldn't go again. After all, it was just a view (and a cool glass floor).

kxx

Wordless Wednesday

2011-07-27T19:16:00.000-04:00

The Dunrobin Dames. Dragonboat World Crew Medallists!

Toronto (Part the second of 4)

2011-07-26T14:37:00.000-04:00

Luckily for us, we only paddled Thursday, Saturday and Sunday. Which meant Wednesday night and all day Friday we were free to do whatever we wanted. And as a team of 26 women what else does free time in a new city mean but shopping? And for the 2 men that came with us it meant lots of trailing around and holding stuff. They were stars. This was our favourite store and I think all of us bought something from here.

Toronto is a big city but a bit of a copycat. There is a "walk of fame" on a sidewalk that is just like the one in California except that the plaques look a bit like maple leaves instead of stars.

US:

Canada:

See?

Oh and the noisy bustling intersection with the busy billboards and big screens?

Hm. Where have I seen that before?

Still, it was a new city to me and it was tons of fun. I'd like to go back with the kids next time. I find it so much fun to see places through the children's eyes.

kxx

I'm so tired. (Part the first of 4)

2011-07-25T18:10:00.000-04:00

Best. Weekend. Ever.

I'm exhausted but happy, happy, happy. Our team went to Toronto with the hopes of getting a pretty sweet t-shirt, loads of wonderful memories and an experience of a lifetime. While we came away with all that stuff, we also won 2 silver medals and a bronze. What?! I know, right? The Dunrobin Dames are ICF Dragonboat World Club Crew Medallists!

I'm still recovering from being out in 40C humidity temps and paddling 13 races over 3 days so I'm not up to going into too much more detail than to say that I'm happy, satisfied and proud of all of us. We did so well!

Silver: 200m Standard (20 seat) Boat, our best time: 53:63
Silver: 500m Standard Boat, our best time: 2:17.79
Bronze: 2000m Standard Boat, our best time (our only time... you can't paddle this brutal race in heats): 10:40.46

Now back to lying on the couch and catching up on shows on my PVR queue.

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-07-22T11:17:00.006-04:00

Since I'm still in Toronto paddling my arms off, what would be a better word of the day than "dragonboat"?

Here's a blog from October 2010. It has a photo of a woman I was once compared to at my former gym. I think the guy was on steroids or something. But who am I to complain?

Enjoy your weekend and I'll see you Monday with all the stats and fun from my adventure in Toronto.

kxx

This is what I got when I Googled "paddle comic"

I'm at the dragonboat world crew championships!

2011-07-21T11:54:00.002-04:00

I scheduled this to come out Thursday so I don't have any info about how we are doing but I'm sure we are kicking asses and taking names.

Rest assured I'll be telling you all about it next week. Absolute overkill complete with photos. I'm not going to apologize for it, either. I mean, how many people can say that they competed in the World Championships of anything. There are opening and closing ceremonies, an athlete's village, the works. There is even a parade of the teams before the festivities. Hey, the Olympics called. They want their intellectual property back. All joking aside, this is a huge deal so expect at least 3 blogs devoted to it next week. At least. I know you can't wait.

kxx

Nearly Wordless Wednesday

2011-07-20T10:10:00.002-04:00

Still no word from this kid. I'm thisclose to calling the camp myself and humiliating him in front of his friends. Sigh.

kxx

Where the holy hell is my idiot son?

2011-07-19T14:17:00.001-04:00

I've been waiting to hear anything... even a peep from that ungrateful child. We dropped him off at 7am on 9 July and that was the last time I heard anything from him. I know he's fine otherwise we would have gotten a call from the camp but you'd think we'd have crossed his mind for a fraction of a second during the down time I know he has.

I can hear you now: "But Karen, Elliott's a 15 year old boy, hours away from his parents for 3 weeks of freedom! He'll call when he's ready." Well, I reserve the right not to accept that. For the first week, fine. He's having fun, he doesn't even remember he's got a family let alone feel any inclination or desire to call them. Fine. I can accept that. But we're heading into week two and my patience has completely run out. I run for the phone whenever it rings. I freak when anyone's on the phone for longer than 5 minutes, I grump and grouch all day and I even called my wonderful cat a "stupid asshole" this morning.

It's even worse because I'm off to Toronto tomorrow morning and I won't get to ~~yell at~~ talk to him even if (and that's a big if) he calls home in the next few days.

Just an unfair comparison: Henry had a sleepover last night. The boy called home when he arrived here, again at 11pm to "say goodnight" and first thing this morning before he left for home. He called his parents 3 times in less than 12 hours. And he lives 10 minutes away. On foot. Yes, the boy is 11 but still it stung everytime that kid asked if he could use the phone.

Anyway, maybe getting that out will save me from screaming at him ~~when~~ if he calls. But it won't stop me from fantasising about stringing him up by his bony, ungrateful thumbs.

kxx

It's over.

2011-07-18T17:22:00.001-04:00

Audrey and I spent all last week watching the Harry Potter movies to catch up for the "really big show" of the last installment. I had read all the books twice and and seen up to movie number 3. Audrey is halfway through the first book.

These movies are fantastic. They are full of action, fantasy and fun. Excellent to see movies that are equally enjoyable for 48 year olds and 11 year olds. It's so much fun to see the actors grow up on screen into men and women and pretty good little actors. I was most amazed and delighted by Neville Longbottom's flight into puberty. He was so chubby and sweet during the first movie and turned into a tall lanky hero. Loved it! I'm happy that the production team made such good leaps of faith years ago and were able to follow their choices through until the end.

And the movies (and books) are so well done. You get immersed in a world where photographs and portraits wave at you and you have to catch your chocolate before you eat it and it never seemed too far out of the ordinary. JK Rowling is a flipping genius. All the characters are flawed including Harry and that makes them human whether they actually are or not.

So anyway, enough's been said about the series by smarter people than me. I'll just add that I loved them and they'll live forever on fantasy channel holiday marathons for years to come. If you haven't seen them, do yourself a favour. The books can be a hard slog but really, remember they are geared toward children and don't embarrass yourself. If you don't have time, just download the lot, sit back, and spend a few hours/days at Hogwarts. You won't regret it.

kxx

Flashback Friday!

2011-07-15T21:47:00.002-04:00

Ooh! It's a late one today. It's about 9pm and I'm watching So You Think You Can Dance Canada. In keeping with the fact that this is my favourite show (of many I have to admit... maybe I should specify favourite dance show), today's search word is "judge".

This post is from 24 February 2006. I titled it "I'm an ill, ill, woman"

Have a great weekend, folks! I'm going to spend mine wondering if Elliott actually remembers he's in a family and didn't just apparate (like the Harry Potter reference?) at cadet camp from nowhere. I mean how hard is it to just pick up a phone? It's been 7 days, people and we haven't heard a thing from that dummy.

kxx

PS- Audrey and I are going to see the Harry Potter movie this weekend. Like 80% of the known world. Did you hear the stat that the midnight show last night alone made $25 million? Lordy. Anyway, I want to share the embarrassing fact that I read all 7 books twice and I never got that Diagon Alley (a place they go to or mention in every book) was a play on "diagonally" until I watched the 3rd movie. This past Tuesday. And this is a series geared to children. I thought I'd share.

Time Suck of the Day

2011-07-14T17:19:00.000-04:00

So the Emmy nominations came out and I'm not as interested as I should be as an avid tv fan. I love lots of shows and am very very loyal. Once I start watching something, you'll have to cancel it to get me to stop. Which is quite disturbing when you think about how long some shows go for. For instance I've been watching Coronation Street for 21 years (to give me credit, that's out of a possible 50). No sign of ending for that one. I've actually been watching All My Children for longer (over 35 years) but the powers that be decided earlier this year to put me out of my misery and cancel it in the fall. Mixed feelings on that one. Yay to my hour back in the middle of the day, Boo to no more Erica Kane.

Anyway, back to the Emmys. They started a new category a few years ago having to do with choreography. One of my favourite shows ever is So You Think You Can Dance. When the noms came out I went straingt to YouTube with the list to watch all the nominated routines. Oh my hell, these kids really can dance. I spent the better part of the afternoon, not only watching the nominated videos but favourites from seasons past. That "suggestions" strip should be disabled.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xi1GYQv2Lb0 I wanted to embed this one but it wouldn't let me. But go see it. It's breath-taking.

So now that I've emerged from my fog of dancing and cat videos (I got distracted and clicked on a video of a cat using an iPad and lost another 45 minutes watching kittens playing piano)

Anyway, my day is pretty much done. Oh, the life of leisure. I have to make dinner and go to dragonboat, then it's time for bed. So thanks YouTube for helping me waste another lovely summer day.

kxx

Never Wordless Wednesday

2011-07-13T15:23:00.000-04:00

I'm in training right now to go to the Dragonboat World Crew Championships in Toronto. As part of our training, our coach has given us a brutal core exercise routine that we need to do every day. After my daily run, I roll out my yoga mat to start my painful self-torture. Until someone sees the mat. In his eyes, it means another interesting place to sprawl. And what can I do? He's the head of the household and he demands satisfaction. And getting a bit of a break from those hellacious crunches makes it a win-win.

In case you are curious, here's my core workout:

Warm up:
2x10 pushups
Plank hold 2 x 1min
Side plank hold 30sec x 2 both sides

Abdominal circuit:
No rest in between exercises
1) Centre crunch x 10
2) Table top crunch (knees off floor ) x 10
3) Straight cycle x 10 (shoulders lifted)
4) Leg raises - x10 (shoulders lifted)
5) Cycle with rotation x10 (opposite knee to elbow)
6) V sit rotation with medicine ball

Repeat x 3 with 2 min. max. rest between circuits.

Ouch, am I right? The first time I did it I sneezed hours later and almost peed my pants.

I wish I was joking.

kxx

Reason #135 why I love this neighbourhood

2011-07-12T17:49:00.001-04:00

The beach.

Audrey and I were at loose ends this afternoon after watching the 3rd Harry Potter movie. We're on a push to watch them all then go to the theatre to see the final installment. Anyway, after the movie was over we decided to hit the beach.

No long drives for us to get there. No way. We put our stuff in the car, drove all of 5 minutes and there we were. Tons of sand, beach volleyball, slushy drinks from the commissary and even a little surf. Yes, I'm aware it's a river, but there are cute little waves.

We sat in the sun, we splashed a bit in the water and relaxed for a couple of hours within 2 kms of my kitchen. I love this neighbourhood.

Audrey and I are alone!

2011-07-11T20:09:00.001-04:00

And we sure aren't complaining. She's been snuggling in bed with me, yesterday we went shopping and tonight we're going out for Chinese. We went jogging out near the stables this morning and searched for cupcake supplies this afternoon. The house has been devoid of boy smells, any and all shooting noises, mysterious cumbs on the floor and Nutella gooped knives on the kitchen counter. Why do they need a different knife for both pieces of toast? And how do they get Nutella all the way up the handle? Anyway, my point is why do I miss them so darned much? Don't tell Audrey I said that. She's loving being an only child this week a darn sight more than I'm enjoying being a single mother. Not that Audrey isn't the coolest daughter ever, only that my boys are part of me too.

It's funny. You spend so much time fantasizing about spending time on your own, having cake before dinner, watching romantic comedies without having to endure the sarcastic sniggering and when the time comes you actually get bored really quick and end up talking about them all day long to anyone who'll listen.

So... are you still listening? Hello? Guys?

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-07-08T17:08:00.000-04:00

This is meta. The flashback I'm referring to in today's post, refers to me flashing back to my pubescence. Mind-blowing, eh? Anyway, it made me giggle and I thought it'd do the same for you.

February 23, 2010 - A Blast From The Past

Have a terrific weekend and make sure to get lots of rest. I know I will as all 3 of my boys will be away. Girl's weekend, anyone?

kxx

Such a geek!

2011-07-07T16:18:00.000-04:00

Being a geek is totally in fashion right now. Remember when kids with asthma or braces or glasses used to get teased? Now try to find someone without a breathing problem, crooked teeth or wonky eyes. In fact, the other day Audrey said she couldn't wait to get braces so she could get purple elastics. For those of you without a teenaged girl in your life, purple is Justin Bieber's favourite colour. Geeks run the world right now so it wouldn't pay to get on their bad side.

But I have a geek theory. Geeks aren't geeks about everything in their lives and everyone is geeky about something. Take me for instance (and just by reading my blog for any length of time means that you do):

I'm a complete geek about Star Trek. But not all the Star Treks, just The Next Generation. You know, the one with Captain Picard. There was a time while it was still running that I could name the episode before the title even came up and I'd make it a game to know the names of the shuttles they used in each episode. The El-Baz was a particular favourite, showing up in a number of my favourite episodes, namely Time Squared.

So while I can tell you which season a particular episode is from just by the cut of their Starfleet uniforms, I can't figure out how to use Microsoft Excel to save my life. See? Extreme geekery in only one facet of the geek spectrum.

So what about you? What are you geeky about?

kxx

Wordless Wednesday

2011-07-06T15:49:00.001-04:00

I'm posting anyway even though this virus thing is still hanging on. I don't know which link is yucky and I can't get to my blog to find it. What a pain. When I get through this I'm going to be super careful where I link to.

So. Wordless Wednesday.

Audrey and I went for a run this morning. It was drizzling when we left and it turned into a full-on downpour only a third of the way through. There were even a few cracks of thunder that scared the lycra off us made us run just a little bit faster through the tree-lined bike trail. Once we were on the way home we were already soaked completely through so we detoured through every puddle, splashing and laughing all the way. We had a ball. It was honestly one of the best runs I've ever had.

kxx

I DID IT! I found the icky link! Feel free to read my blog safely again. Enjoy!

Still having an issue and I don't know how to fix it!

2011-07-05T13:46:00.000-04:00

If there are any techies out there who can walk me through this virus thing step by step, I'd be much obliged. I've been to the Blogger website and I can only decipher the title of what I want. After that it becomes a babbling cacophony of acronyms and geek-speak. Help! My email is mamashake@gmail.com if anyone out there can help a sister out. Thanks guys!

kxx

Uh Oh!

2011-07-04T12:09:00.000-04:00

My blog has caught a virus of some sort and I'm working on cleaning it up. Sorry, no blog today as I'm completely confused about all this stuff. Hopefully things will be back to normal tomorrow...

kxx

Oh Canada!

2011-07-01T14:10:00.001-04:00

I just spent 2 hours at my local park. There's a festival there with rides, a petting zoo, music, and tons of people partying in red and white.

While I'm always a really proud first generation Canadian, you know what warms my heart like nothing else? New Canadians. I love seeing the effort that they make on such a special day. I saw a man in a red turban and maple leaf face tattoos. I grinned and waved at the little girl in the hijab with the straw "Canada Rocks" cowboy hat. This is what Canada is all about.

I love Canada and I'm proud to have been born here but it seems to me that nothing compares to someone who adopts this awesome country as their own.

So Happy Birthday to all of us. Why? Because we are Canada.

kxx

Last day of school

2011-06-30T17:44:00.001-04:00

Look ma, I've changed!

The last few years on the last day of school, I've posted how afraid I was of the kids being home, of how they'd start in with the "I'm boreds" within seconds and about how I couldn't wait for school to start again even though they'd been off for less than a couple of hours. It's true. Go see. I'll wait.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

See? Well for some reason, this year it's different. Maybe because they're older. I'm excited for the kids to be here with me all day. We're going to have such a ball! I've got such plans... beach, zip lines, rafting, movies... I can't wait! Yes, they will get bored and I have rags and buckets for those occasions. The car and their rooms always need attention if they're looking to me for ideas on what to do. Other than that I feel a bit like Julie from the Love Boat. I always wanted to be her. The Cruise Director of a big important ship. Yeah, the SS Kaye. Toot Toot!

So if you'll excuse me, I've got to make more plans. The kids are circling around the computer like a school of sharks. Hey, I inadvertently kept the seafaring analogy going. Look at me... I'm a writer.

kxx

Not-Very Wordless Wednesday

2011-06-29T17:28:00.000-04:00

Lots of shopping today! Why? Because we're going to be sitting in the VIP section for the Canada Day evening show on Parliament Hill and I want us to look nice. That's what I was banging on about yesterday. I'm so excited! I was told to dress "casual" but my casual:

and VIP casual:

is a leetle different. Personally, I'm trying for the second look but will inevitably feel like (if not look like) the first look.

Actually I'm going for white jeans (!) and a white top with red shoes and purse. I don't want to overdo it with the Canada flag/red and white stuff but I still wanted to be patriotic. And classy. Because you never know who'll show up!

Full report on our outfits (oh yeah, the whole family is going, too. Heh.) tomorrow and a complete review with video and photos on Monday.

kxx

Hi!

2011-06-28T16:25:00.001-04:00

I don't know what to write right now. Something awesome just happened and I'm not ready to post it... I just want to enjoy it on my own for a while. Don't worry, you'll all hear about it soon enough, trust me.

I felt the same when I went into labour the first time. The contractions woke me up from a deep sleep. Instead of waking up Scott right away, I "enjoyed" those first few contreactions all by myself for about half an hour before U woke him up. Not that I'm comparing this recent awesome thing with that old awesome thing from 15 years ago but it is more immediate.

Anyway, I'm a happy camper and that's all you need to know for today. Ooh, how about a photographic hint? Feel free to guess...

Happy "Birthday" Taz!

2011-06-27T12:45:00.000-04:00

Well, we call it a birthday but it's actually the day my awesome, amazing cat came to live with us.

So here's the story:

We had another cat named Endora who truly lived up to her name. Red headed and evil (I'd even say witchlike), he'd hide under couches and on stairs and mercilessly slice at unsuspecting passersby with her razor claws. She destroyed my furniture, she alienated my friends, she hissed at us even when we were feeding or petting her and was generally the most horrible, unloveable, frightening, awful cat ever. We put up with it for 9 years until she had some kidney thing and thankfully dropped dead. I shed a tear but it wasn't sad... it was more like I'd dropped a plate and it shattered all over the floor. I'd miss the plate but oh well. I swore to never own a cat again.

Endora had been gone a few weeks and my neighbour Tina was moving. She told me she was taking her cat to the shelter. He was full grown and I knew that if she took him there he'd never leave. I told her I'd take him for a couple of weeks and bring him to the shelter myself if he was even a fraction like Endora. That was 12 years ago.

She'd had him declawed but still let him outside. We were against both things so we thought we'd try making him an indoor cat since the claw thing was impossible to fix. Yeah, that didn't last long. He pissed on everything in anger and rocketed out between our legs every time we opened up the door. Chasing him around the neighbourhood was too much trouble. So we deal with a clawless outdoor cat. I worry about him everytime he goes out but he's so much happier. He even still brings home all kinds of neighbourhood vermin and birds so he's not completely crippled.

Over the years we've had some hilarious stories with him. Like the time he followed Audrey into her school and disrupted the afternoon as they chased him around trying to catch him. How many times do you get a call from the school principal asking you to please come and pick up your cat?

Then there was the time he hopped up onto the couch to meet my new baby niece and when he hopped down again the leather couch was crawling with worms. There wasn't enough Purell in my house for her mum to clean her up and I was never more humiliated in my life.

So anyway, he's the best cat ever. Loving, adorable, noisy (he "talks" to us and purrs loudly just for the offense of looking in his direction) and amazing. I'd like to wish him the best adoption day ever and now I'm off to bake another cat shaped cake at the request of the kids. I barely need an excuse, do I?

kxx

Flashback Friday

2011-06-24T20:12:00.000-04:00

I'm watching an old episode Gilligan's Island with the kids. The kids love nothing better than to watch tv shows of my youth and pick them apart. It's actually quite funny to watch them skewer my old faves but I sure realise how much more mature kids today are. I never questioned why Ginger had so many outfits and the Professor had so many books on a 3 hour tour. I just shut up and watched. Now they're talking about triangulating signals to find the castaway's location and laughingly wondering how it's possible for Mary Ann to make a pie crust in the jungle with no Crisco. The cooking thing? So my kids.

So anyway, the word of the day for Flashback Friday is "Ginger". Enjoy this post from March 2007. It's a slice of life (in all its weirdness) from my family in the 80's.

Have a great weekend!

kxx

Weirdness from yesterday

2011-06-23T13:03:00.001-04:00

Scott and I had a day out alone together. He had a meeting and I, naturally, wanted to shop.

At the mall I thought I lost my $300 sunglasses. I retraced my steps and found them at a store where I put them down as I tried on tops. There was no ledge in the change room so I hooked them on the neck of one of the tops I ended up not taking. The manager and I looked everywhere with no luck. Then after I gave her my name and number I thought I'd look at the rack of t-shirts where I'd seen the one I'd tried on. Sure enough, there they were still hooked on t-shirt only back on the rack. How did they not notice when restocking? Anyway...

Later, Scott and I went to a jeweller to have our wedding rings re-sized. His went up half a size and mine a whopping 2 sizes. Hello, sausage fingers. The thing is, I've been wearing them for 16 years, never taking them off for anything. Ever. They've been off my finger for maybe a grand total of 20 minutes in all those years. So my knuckle got bigger but the actual finger stayed the same size. Now the knuckle is even more swollen after I spent 10 minutes crying and soaping my hand trying to pry the rings off before I got there.

Then at the end of the day, Henry came home from school with a goatee drawn on his face in green marker. Supposedly he and his friends were brimming with end-of-the-year silliness when the incident occurred. He said it happened at lunchtime so he went all afternoon, took the schoolbus and walked home looking like this:

He says I should "see the other guys". Ugh, boys. What a strange day.

kxx

Wordless Wednesday

2011-06-22T13:51:00.000-04:00

Here is a video from Audrey's birthday party over the weekend. The girls were making a godawful racket and I ran upstairs to find them doing this. Kinda cool. Noisy but cool.

kxx

Massive thanks!

2011-06-21T14:53:00.000-04:00

The Dragonboat Festival on the weekend was incredible. Our club teams did really well winning a gold and 2 bronze medals. The day was glorious. Cool in the shade, warm (but not hot) in the sun, no humidity... perfect. There were a couple of flies in the ointment, though. We had a brisk 5 second head wind that messed with our times and we had a near disaster when another boat hit and nearly tipped us but it was amazing, fantastic fun. I can't wait to do this again at the Dragonboat World Crews in Toronto in a few weeks.

Now how's that for not boring my non-dragonboat readers by going on and on about it? I have to admit I had to edit the above paragraph to within an inch of it's life but you gotta do what you gotta do.

Oh one more thing. I want to that my donors from the bottom of my heart. The festival is a blast but it's also a charity event and I want to personally thank:

Lisa, Sean and Holden
Michelle
My daddy
And someone anonymous... who does that? Take the credit, you nut! But it's fantastic and I thank you generous stranger!

I can't tell you how happy I was to receive your donations and know it goes to great causes around the city. Because of you I was able to walk around with 3 clanking medals around my neck. And if you missed out this year, not to worry. There'll be another chance next year at around this time, just stick around. Love you lots,

kxx

This was the view from the stage when we got awarded one of our medals:

*** Watching as the bird that was trapped in your chimney for 24 hours fly out the window and land on a tree across the street = AWESOME! ***

Wanna freak out?

2011-06-20T18:11:00.001-04:00

Here are some seemingly unrelated occurrences from today:

Three notable songs came up on my iTouch while it was merrily on shuffle. They were Celebration by Kool and The Gang, Mama by the Spice Girls and One Sweet Day by Mariah Carey
When I got dressed I grabbed an ancient tank top that I made for home ec in 1983
I put on my pretty pearl stud earrings
I had a mad craving for grapefruit juice which I bought while I was grocery shopping.

I came home and pulled out the juice and poured myself a glass even before I put away any of the groceries. Then another. Scott had come into the room and poured himself a glass. Mid-third glass I said too him "I had an awful craving for grapefruit juice today. You know I never buy it. Weird because it was..."

And it finally hits me. "It was my mother's favourite juice."

Today is the 16th anniversary of my mother's death. I had totally forgotten but she had been sending me messages all day.

Celebration was her all-time favourite song. Mama is about not appreciating your mother until you grow up and One Sweet Day is about saying what you need to to that special person before it's too late.
The ancient tank was made from material my mother salvaged from the skirt of an old 60s dress in the back of her closet.
The pearl earrings were the last gift my brother and I ever gave her.

Isn't that cool? I'm not usually a person who is terribly in tune with the universe or signs or spirit world quackery but when your mother demands attention from the afterlife by grabbing your collars and shaking you can't help but take notice. Message received.

Miss you mum! I love you and I always will.

kxx

Happy Birthday Diva!

2011-06-17T14:19:00.000-04:00

As of 9:00 this morning, 2/3 of my children are teenagers. Audrey turns 13 today. I'm kept busy preparing for her "party" which is no more than a sleepover with gifts. Kids her age just want to "hang out" so gone are the days of me planning a theme for weeks and spending hundreds on a related party complete with matching cake and loot bags. The year she had a garden party I was run ragged making cucumber sandwiches on homemade bread and fondant covered petit fours for each little girl. I made special loot bags containing real china teacups and saucers (from the Salvation Army), and plants from the garden centre topped off with a craft where they decorated the flowerpots then planted the flowers themselves. Whew. Damn my hatred of cheap-ass candy/toy loot bags.

This year she's hosting 5 friends in a tent in the backyard. First they'll go to the local pool then back here for pizza, chips, pop and cake. Then a movie, some sleep (hopefully) and breakfast of bacon and eggs. Easy (and cheap). Apparently there is an upside to having teens.

So here's to my amazing, bright, funny, moody and weird teenage daughter. She takes after her mother in every way. I love you baby girl!

kxx